Lest Ye

This writing is Certified Human

“Be tolerant with others and strict with yourself.” — Marcus Aurelius

The Obstacle

We judge
Constantly.

Evaluating
Comparing
Scrutinizing
Correcting.

We see their faults
Numerous
On display
So obvious.

Too tall
Short
Skinny
Fat
Young
Old
Slow
Fast
Smart
Stupid
Unskilled
Unaware
Impatient.

If they were better
They would do things like us.

The judging never ends
Every person
An opportunity to judge.

What does it provide
Better performance
Happiness
Connection
Wisdom?

The Gift and Opportunity

We will judge.

Just as thoughts come uninvited
So do judgments.

We can choose to let them go
Reframe them into something else
Understanding
Curiosity
Creativity
Action.

We do not choose to judge
We choose what we do with it.

An opportunity to better understand
Their thoughts
Situation
Why and how they do what they do.

To learn from their differences
Maybe upgrading how we do things. 

A chance to jump in
Take action
Help
Lessen their burden.

A chance to remember what’s important
And to do it.

The Practice Of Self-Mastery

• Notice the judgment
• Ask if it’s helpful in any way
• Recalibrate to understanding, curiosity, creativity, or action
• Choose what to do with it

CHEAT CODE: NOTICE → ASK → RECALIBRATE → CHOOSE

The Why

I judge others
Constantly.

I see their faults
Have the solution to their problems
I could fix it for them.

My judgment takes me further away
It would not have me listen to my children
Would not allow me to be curious about how they do things
Why they do things
It would only correct and solve impatiently.

It would not allow me to understand where my wife is coming from
It would jump to solving problems for her
Leaving her resentful and me frustrated.

My judgment would run me if I allowed it
Seeing only negative.

When I choose what to do with my judgment
I connect
Learn
Engage
Become present
I enjoy navigating relationships and problems
I am happier
I am less of a jerk.