Shhh…

“First learn the meaning of what you hear, then speak.”— Epictetus

The Obstacle

Shush shush shush it.
We come with judgement and assumptions.

We judge. We assume. We act before we understand.
We think we know someone’s intent, their angle, their position — and we get ourselves into trouble because we’re guessing, not listening. We are usually digging a hole for ourselves.

We waste time, waste energy, burn effort running down the wrong path without all the information we could have had if we could have asked - what’s needed now?.
Worse than that, we damage our relationships.

We don’t like when people do it to us (and they do - and they will), so why would anyone like it from us?

The Gift and Opportunity

Today gives us a mirror — a clean look at the exact work we need. The work is oh so simple, yet not at all easy…

We just shut up…

If we listen first… if we ask before we assume… if we try to understand instead of trying to be right — everything changes. Simple right…?
Less wasted motion.
Less emotion.
Fewer fires to put out.
Better relationships, built on listening and understanding.
Curiosity buys clarity and explores the whole elephant.
Clarity keeps us out of the trouble assumptions bring.

The Practice of Self-Mastery

This one is simple, remember. Now let’s see how easy.

Shh.
Quiet down.
Listen up - really listen.

Before we judge.
Before we speak.
Before we think we know.
Certainly before we act…

Pause.
Ask questions, be curious. Even if we disagree - We see things differently, isn’t that interesting (and it is).
Seek information and understanding.

Slow the reflex to react. Lengthen the fuse.
Hear as you would like to be heard.
Understand as you would like to be understood.

Would you rather they know you were right, or know that you cared?

Simple! Easy..?