Stoic Weekends: What Does It Really Cost? Part 1 of 3: The Material
“Attend therefore to the appearances of things, and watch over them; for that which you have to preserve is no small matter, but it is modesty and fidelity and constancy, freedom from the affects, a state of mind undisturbed, freedom from fear, tranquillity, in a word: liberty. For what will you sell these things? See what is the value of the things which you will obtain in exchange for these.—“But shall I not obtain any such thing for it?”—See, and if you do in return get that, see what you receive in place of it.” – Epictetus
This writing is Certified Human
What does it cost? In the words of Mike Patton, “What is it?” What is it? IT is all things, the material and beyond... What do the physical things we have actually cost us? Is the cost so obvious?
What is obvious is the actual exchange of money for an item. That, however, is not the whole cost. Of the nice things we have, what does it take to keep them nice? What is the price in time and effort? What of the stress and aggravation of keeping an item protected? Will we hover around it, keeping our children from damaging it? Will we hide it away, not using it for fear of wear? What use is it then? What does it cost us in stress and relationships? Does it have so much value that we will continue making payments in stress and worry? Will fear and worry have us not use it at all? In either case, we might consider it both useless and priceless. A paradox.
We have a choice: pay once, and then enjoy. This does not mean we allow all things to go to ruin without care or upkeep. It is not a call to abuse or neglect. We can choose to let a tool be a tool: use it well, clean it, and store it properly. But yes, use it! Let the children use it and learn. Accept the wear and degradation that will accumulate. A used and loved item will have the scars of a well-lived life. The porcelain doll will remain behind the glass, admired only for its beauty, unloved and unused.
We can understand that, in the end, the cost is too high for almost anything to be priceless. If it is not of use, then it is useless. If it is useless, it is not worth the cost we force upon ourselves or our relationships. Choose if you will continue to pay.
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