BOLO
“Everyone faces up more bravely to a thing for which he has long prepared himself” — Seneca
This writing is Certified Human
The Obstacle
We mostly know what our traps are, but we fall into them anyway.
We know the things that will frustrate, irritate, and aggravate us. Yet we keep falling into frustration, irritation, and aggravation.
We know the things that people do that set us off. Yet we continue to be set off by them.
We know our own shortcomings: where we avoid, overly perfect, control, play the victim, worry, and stress. Yet we do it anyway.
When we fall into these traps, it doesn’t help us perform any better.
In fact, it takes energy away from what’s important and leaves less focus and attention for what matters.
It doesn’t help our relationships to continuously anticipate what someone is going to say, what their tone will be, or what their intention is.
That becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We expect things to be different than they actually are, and that holds us back from being as happy and productive as we could be.
The Gift And Opportunity
If we know what’s coming, we should be able to plan for it.
If we have a plan, we’re better able to face what’s coming for us.
It is inevitable that things will not go our way.
It is inevitable that people will be the way they are.
If we can anticipate and plan for the things that show up regularly, we can be in a better position to respond in a way of our choosing. Rather than reacting and being guided by emotion.
We can be on the lookout for what’s coming.
The Practice Of Self-Mastery
• Know the traps
• Plan for what is coming
• Respond by choice
• Be on the lookout
CHEAT CODE: KNOW THE TRAPS → PLAN FOR WHAT’S COMING → RESPOND BY CHOICE → BE ON THE LOOKOUT
The Why
So much in my life is predictable that I should be able to plan for much of my setbacks, frustrations, and disagreements.
I know that people will be the way they are, regardless of how I think they should be.
I should be able to plan for how I will respond in a way that honors the person I’m trying to be.
I know that none of my projects, tasks, or chores ever goes as smoothly as I think it should.
I can plan for that, bake in some extra time, and be ready for the frustration.
When I’m open and ready for what’s coming my way, and I have a plan to deal with it, I can accept what’s coming. I can turn it into a gift or opportunity, or simply let it go without judgment or opinion.
I can have much better relationships with the people around me when I plan for what’s coming, and I can properly plan for how I’ll respond when the wave of emotion comes my way.
I can choose not to be carried away by it.
I can perform better when my mind is not separate or fragmented by frustration, control, perfection, the past, or the future.
When it’s laser-focused on what I’m doing, I can have much better results, less stress, and better relationships.
This is something I can plan for and be on the lookout for.
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